06. You Should be Chasing the Butterflies in Everything You do.

You won't find anything new if your hands are still full of yesterday.

It’s hard to explain, and this is going to come off a bit, well, much, but do you ever sit and think- better yet, KNOW- that you’re destined for greatness in some way; that it just hasn’t happened yet? I know that sounds like I’m full of myself, but I mean it in the least “full of herself” way I can, I promise. Bare with me…

The world is full of so many amazing people, yet only a few actually make it into the realm of “Greatness” they were destined for. I think we all possess the ability to become successful or great in our own way. Everyone has their own individual talents, skillsets or ways about them that set them apart from the everyday. The only difference between the Greats and the Almosts, is that the Almosts never did anything with those talents. They stayed; they didn’t pursue the greatness. For whatever reason, they stayed in their comfort zone and lost their path along the way, making room for the greatness of others.

YuYu Hakusho - (left to right) Hiei, Yusuke, Kurama, Kuwabara

When I say “Great,” I’d like to take a step back and explain what that means in this context. Growing up in the teeny town/city of Moreno Valley, California, I learned very quickly that opportunity wasn’t very accessible. My family didn’t have much of it, similar to most of the families from MoVal, but when you did get it, it was great and you wanted more. You knew there was a world outside of Moreno Valley, the tiny Inland Empire city that molded my toughness and curated my strengths. There were people and places and things on the outside of the city that none of us had ever explored. Mainly because when you grow up in a small place, you tend to never leave that small place. Some fish get very comfy in their fishbowl, but I wasn’t one of them.

Even as a kid, early on I felt different. I wasn’t on the same page as everyone around me, including my own family. I didn’t fit in and I FELT IT. I felt the way my conversations with others was different from how they’d interact with my siblings or cousins. I ran away to my poetry books, journals and sports for any sense of belonging or comfort; where I could be myself and not feel insecure about it. At the time, I thought I was just a lost kid going through a phase, thats one day I would be normal. But if you’re destined for Greatness, you’ll never be normal. I didn’t understand that until now.

As on adult, I’ve been able to cohesively structure all of these moments from my past, in order to help guide the pathway for my future. I say guide because we will NEVER have the capability of knowing what tomorrow brings, but we can prepare-.

For a long time, I accepted mid level jobs, mid level pay, and a mid level life because I was secure. I had the time to work, and I had the time to play. I had money for bills, I had money for fun. I wasn’t living this crazy lifestyle, but me and my dog were comfortable, the lights were always on, and we were never hungry. My job didn’t take much brain power, and I had already graduated college so I didn’t necessarily have anything else planned. I became a schedule: wake up, feed the dog, go to work, walk the dog, go to gym, walk the dog, eat dinner, walk the dog, sleep with the occasional weekend volleyball tournaments here and there. There was no “what else,” until there was. (thats a story for another time).

When that moment came, my entire world shifted. One day I was fine and unbothered living a perfectly mediocre life, and the next, none of it was enough for me. I was no longer happy living my day to day in a never ending routine and I needed more. I needed more money, I needed more education, I needed a better job- I really wasn’t sure what I needed- other than it wasn’t this. So I left it. I left behind the easy and mindless life I had, with absolutely NO IDEA of what was to come but anything different was going to be better than this.

I let go of this notion that I was or am the same person I was as a teenager or even in my twenties. The person that my family and friends knew for so long was gone. I had evolved and it was beautiful. My mind was more open and I knew how to better communicate it. In making room for my new life, I had to let go of my old one and that was the most eye-opening thing I’ve ever done. I had to re-open myself up to failure and fear for the sake of finding the butterflies again.

You know the phrase, “if you spend your time chasing butterflies, they’ll fly away,” - what’s wrong with letting them fly? The thing about being great or wanting to be great isn’t because you’re just so good at something that you become the best. Far from. Greatness comes from that fire within you that isn’t okay with the everyday. Whether that means your job, your friends, your passions or world even. Greatness doesn’t adapt to the world, it wills the world to adapt to it. You make room for greatness, it commands it. Just like a butterfly. You can’t control where they fly or where they land. But the more they flurry, the happier life seems to be. Isn’t that what butterflies are anyway? Happiness.

They don’t come from a routine or spending hours in the garden. These butterflies aren’t the romantic long lost love you think you’re meant to be with either. It’s the thrill of you! The thrill of what you do with your hands, with your mind, with your conviction. The excitement and nervousness of potentially failing but knowing you’ll catch yourself anyway. The butterflies are the things we let go all too soon, all for the sake of normalcy or stability. Giving up on our dreams for the comfortability of a 9-5 job, getting married and having kids for the sake of being a good wife or husband. There is this common misconception that being an adult require you to give up pieces of yourself; your laughter, your joyous humor, bright and fun colors even. “You can’t do this, you’re a mom.” or “You have to do this cause what about your future?”

FUCK MY FUTURE. Not exactly, but being great means you can’t be afraid of that shit.

If you know you, you know you won’t let yourself fail. Even if you did, greatness can’t be stopped. It can’t be subdued and it can’t be caged. It grows and it manifests itself in ways you are never prepared for. Just like butterflies. You don’t know when they’re coming, but you feel them dancing and prancing up against your stomach and fluttering around your heart. You feel it in your body and fingertips, that something electrifying is happening so you open yourself up to it. The butterflies are your compass, and you won’t find butterflies in the break room of your 9-5. You find it in your growth, in your trials and tribulations, and in the work you put in for that. What, you thought being great wasn’t going to require work? That’s all it ever is. And if you aren’t chasing the butterflies in everything you do, you’re just going from one boring routine to the next.

Each and everyone of us is capable of extraordinary things. Whether that’s creative direction and brand marketing education, or maybe you’re a kickass chef or seamstress or you’re mixtape is hot fire. Whatever your thing is, love it and be great at it. If you don’t get butterflies doing whatever it is you do, living whatever life you live, greatness may not live in this portion of your story. It’s developing, and you need to nurture it, to see what the next chapter holds.

Thank you so much for Reading this issue of The Cafecito Weekly!

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